The see off cup of tea...
The see off cup of chai...
It was an unusually very quite and silent Aligarh that morning...I looked at the sleepy dogs on the road ..half Dozing off .. Only waking up with a start on the occasional ring of the cycle bell of milkman and newspaper men passing by...we could see the white herd of namazis returning from the early morning " fajir" ki namaz ... Turned around to hear the sound of chimes from the near by morning Aarti in the temple on the side of the road..there was a Halwai frying pipe hot morning jalebis in a huge kadai..we both were silently sitting in the moving rickshaw going towards the railway station to catch an early morning train.. Me holding on tightly to my bag with one hand and clutching his arm with the other one.. Loved doing that...His reassuring kind and so comforting arm.. It never failed to give me a sense of belonging and feel of a safe cocoon..Just like I always used to since I was a little girl.. I instinctively put my head on his shoulder and he lovingly caressed my face with his soft gentle hand..no words were spoken.. No words were needed between us.. Not today .. Not ever..
It was a very crowded Aligarh ka railway station when we arrived and I was slowly crossing the foot overbridge with my bag on my shoulder to platform no 2 from where my early morning train for Delhi was assigned to leave..I slowed down ..turned back.. Seeing him climbing with an effort .. I could clearly sense his discomfort which he was trying hard to hide.. Though I knew his answer ..But I tried one last time by requesting him again to not climb the stairs .." I am fine ...I can go myself..please don't exert your knees".. I earnestly urged him.. He gently smiled back " I know u r fine.. I know u will manage .." But it's me who needs this.. U see It's for me ..not u..," I had no answer to this.. I gave in.. Like always...we silently climbed the stairs down.,,As we sat down on an empty bench on the platform .. I suddenly noticed he was little breathless .. In that one instant he looked suddenly so old and fragile to me.. Wanted to hug him tight In that instant...tell him to give all his tiredness and worries to me.. Tell him to not worry for me at all.. He looked tired " chai?"... I whispered ...His eyes twinkled with affirmation as I sprang up towards the famous Chai shop on the platform.. As we both settled with our customary see off chai ka cup " he related to me interesting anecdotes of his young days in AMU .. When he used to come to see off his classmates and hostel mates and this see off chai used to be a must customary part of the whole exercise.. We both laughed at his funny anecdotes laced with witty Urdu couplets.. Just then I spotted the newspaper stand and rushed to grab the morning daily for him.. Armed with the fresh edition of " Frontliine" in my hand for him as I got back .. He beamed at me " now that's like my beto. Yes I needed this".. He added but folded it and kept it his tiny shoulder bag instead of reading it.. I could see he wanted to grab each and every moment now with me..
As the train moved in the platform and I got up to pick my luggage up.. He slowly got up to help me.. Not listening to any of my request to pl keep sitting " I will manage " .. He looked up gave me a slow smile saying " of course you will manage beta .. in fact very well .. I know that...But I won't ..I will miss my Beti a lot",. I was zapped wanted to rush back to him.. Hold him.. Hug him tight.. Tell him I am not going .. But instead with teary eyes .. Not uttering a word .. They were failing me then..I climbed the train compartment and stood back to wave at him.. As I looked at him I found him suddenly rushing to a nearby shop .. Not understanding the reason for his sudden rush I tried to keep trying to follow his white haired tall head in the sea of waving faces and hands.. Suddenly his head popped again..the eyes were tired and emotional .. But there was a purpose and determination in his eyes then.. I looked questioningly at him and then he came close and thrusted a chilled water bottle in my hot nervous hands " paani ke bina safar nahin karte"... As the train whistled I held his hand one more time tightly and then let it go..
As the train slowly left the station .. I could sense him standing at that same point following me with his eyes till he could .. Smiling and waving at me brightly till he lost my vision.. Then of course I could imagine him " sigh .. Walk back with drooping shoulders..Pick up his bag and stick to walk back to climb the formidable steps back on his lonely journey back home"...
As I settled on my window seat in the train .. I looked at the fast moving scene outside the window .. ..I was teary... Scene was getting blurred for me....Train was moving ahead which was good.... I thought " but it was also leaving the familiar places people and scenes behind.. .." .. Is that good ? Is that fair?.. And then I remembered Abba 's words " yeh toh duniya ka dastoor hai.. Kuch paane ke liye humien hamesha Kuch khone ke liye tayyar rehna chahiye"... " yes it's fair" I whispered to myself with a heavy but determined heart and sat back to sip on the cool water from the bottle Abba had thrusted in my hand just before parting...
It was an unusually very quite and silent Aligarh that morning...I looked at the sleepy dogs on the road ..half Dozing off .. Only waking up with a start on the occasional ring of the cycle bell of milkman and newspaper men passing by...we could see the white herd of namazis returning from the early morning " fajir" ki namaz ... Turned around to hear the sound of chimes from the near by morning Aarti in the temple on the side of the road..there was a Halwai frying pipe hot morning jalebis in a huge kadai..we both were silently sitting in the moving rickshaw going towards the railway station to catch an early morning train.. Me holding on tightly to my bag with one hand and clutching his arm with the other one.. Loved doing that...His reassuring kind and so comforting arm.. It never failed to give me a sense of belonging and feel of a safe cocoon..Just like I always used to since I was a little girl.. I instinctively put my head on his shoulder and he lovingly caressed my face with his soft gentle hand..no words were spoken.. No words were needed between us.. Not today .. Not ever..
It was a very crowded Aligarh ka railway station when we arrived and I was slowly crossing the foot overbridge with my bag on my shoulder to platform no 2 from where my early morning train for Delhi was assigned to leave..I slowed down ..turned back.. Seeing him climbing with an effort .. I could clearly sense his discomfort which he was trying hard to hide.. Though I knew his answer ..But I tried one last time by requesting him again to not climb the stairs .." I am fine ...I can go myself..please don't exert your knees".. I earnestly urged him.. He gently smiled back " I know u r fine.. I know u will manage .." But it's me who needs this.. U see It's for me ..not u..," I had no answer to this.. I gave in.. Like always...we silently climbed the stairs down.,,As we sat down on an empty bench on the platform .. I suddenly noticed he was little breathless .. In that one instant he looked suddenly so old and fragile to me.. Wanted to hug him tight In that instant...tell him to give all his tiredness and worries to me.. Tell him to not worry for me at all.. He looked tired " chai?"... I whispered ...His eyes twinkled with affirmation as I sprang up towards the famous Chai shop on the platform.. As we both settled with our customary see off chai ka cup " he related to me interesting anecdotes of his young days in AMU .. When he used to come to see off his classmates and hostel mates and this see off chai used to be a must customary part of the whole exercise.. We both laughed at his funny anecdotes laced with witty Urdu couplets.. Just then I spotted the newspaper stand and rushed to grab the morning daily for him.. Armed with the fresh edition of " Frontliine" in my hand for him as I got back .. He beamed at me " now that's like my beto. Yes I needed this".. He added but folded it and kept it his tiny shoulder bag instead of reading it.. I could see he wanted to grab each and every moment now with me..
As the train moved in the platform and I got up to pick my luggage up.. He slowly got up to help me.. Not listening to any of my request to pl keep sitting " I will manage " .. He looked up gave me a slow smile saying " of course you will manage beta .. in fact very well .. I know that...But I won't ..I will miss my Beti a lot",. I was zapped wanted to rush back to him.. Hold him.. Hug him tight.. Tell him I am not going .. But instead with teary eyes .. Not uttering a word .. They were failing me then..I climbed the train compartment and stood back to wave at him.. As I looked at him I found him suddenly rushing to a nearby shop .. Not understanding the reason for his sudden rush I tried to keep trying to follow his white haired tall head in the sea of waving faces and hands.. Suddenly his head popped again..the eyes were tired and emotional .. But there was a purpose and determination in his eyes then.. I looked questioningly at him and then he came close and thrusted a chilled water bottle in my hot nervous hands " paani ke bina safar nahin karte"... As the train whistled I held his hand one more time tightly and then let it go..
As the train slowly left the station .. I could sense him standing at that same point following me with his eyes till he could .. Smiling and waving at me brightly till he lost my vision.. Then of course I could imagine him " sigh .. Walk back with drooping shoulders..Pick up his bag and stick to walk back to climb the formidable steps back on his lonely journey back home"...
As I settled on my window seat in the train .. I looked at the fast moving scene outside the window .. ..I was teary... Scene was getting blurred for me....Train was moving ahead which was good.... I thought " but it was also leaving the familiar places people and scenes behind.. .." .. Is that good ? Is that fair?.. And then I remembered Abba 's words " yeh toh duniya ka dastoor hai.. Kuch paane ke liye humien hamesha Kuch khone ke liye tayyar rehna chahiye"... " yes it's fair" I whispered to myself with a heavy but determined heart and sat back to sip on the cool water from the bottle Abba had thrusted in my hand just before parting...
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